Pastor sells Congregation on eBay

BIG TIMBER, Mont. — Without their consent or knowledge, a pastor in rural Montana has sold his church and congregation on eBay for $3 million.
"I finally got good and sick of them," says Tad Marshall, pastor for 15 years who completed the secret sale last week. "This serves them right. All of them."
But many in the church are stunned by the Marshall family’s sudden departure.
"We had such a good relationship," says Winifred Barnes. "Whenever I called him in the middle of the night to pray for my psoriasis, he was happy to help. I’m surprised he would treat us this way."
Others expressed similar feelings.
"We would stop by for surprise visits every time he had a day off, and his wife was always quick to put a pot of coffee on," says Fred Souther. "We’d sit there and chat for hours. Those were wonderful times."
One woman recalls how Pastor Marshall responded to her plea to visit her ailing mother every day during her prolonged illness at a hospital 78 miles away.
"I don’t think he did it because we threatened to quit the church. I think he was genuinely concerned for Mother even though she was in a coma," she says. "We would sit with her for hours singing hymns to her. I could tell he was blessed by it."
Another longtime member recalls the day a group of women surprised the pastor’s wife with an impromptu shopping trip.
"It was clear she was unable to afford modest clothing, so we charged right in and threw away everything in her closet," she says. "Then we bought her new ankle-length dresses with long sleeves. She cried tears of joy that day. She kept saying, ‘I can’t believe you’re doing this.’ It was a bonding moment for all of us."
Even the board, which had its share of differences with Marshall, recalls him fondly. They say he happily abided by the church’s Dress and Grooming Code, kept sermons to 23 minutes as the board required and even abandoned his use of the New Living translation on Sunday morning.
"Once he understood it is a devilish translation that twists the words of the original spoken English, he said he’d be happy to go back to using the Authorized King James Version," an elder says. "That’s the way Tad was. A real go-along guy."
Friends from out of state say Marshall came to rural Montana hoping to find a friendly lifestyle where he could help good-hearted people grow closer to Christ. Instead he found "an enclave of faux-Christian Pharisees" who demanded he serve their every whim, says one seminary buddy. One day while selling old exercise equipment on eBay to supplement his church income, which had been docked by the board because a service had gone too long, Marshall decided to rid himself of the congregation in a creative way.
His eBay listing emphasized the positive: "This delightful country church sits on 2 acres of land. Comes complete with congregation and 35 regular tithers! Sunday school wing, no mortgage. Bids start at $200,000."
Recent Bible college graduates bid first, hoping to gain a built-in congregation on the cheap. Then several entrepreneurs with ministry ambitions swooped in, driving the price up. Kevin Silver, a 39-year-old former Internet company founder, won with a last-minute bid. He is looking forward to "leaving the spiritual corruption of the big city behind" and taking the helm of the rural congregation.
"I always wanted to serve at a little country church where decent people just want to pursue God," he says. "My wife and I are looking forward to settling into community life and getting to know these wonderful folks. This will be a great second chapter of life for us." •

www.larknews.com/febru...php?page=1

(just thought you'd enjoy a good laugh!)

Pirates

The Pirates Who Don't Do Anything that is.
Took the kids to see it at the theater today and I did something I've never done before.

I complained to the management about another patron.

Maybe it's all the mystery shopping that gave me the courage.

Just as the movie was starting a woman came in with four little children. I'm pretty sure she was the grandma. They sat in the same row as us (the back row) on the opposite end. From the moment they arrived they were loud. VERY LOUD. Finally the people seated in front of them (after many look-back-over-the-shoulder-at-them looks) got up and moved.

Then grandma's phone rang. And she answered it. And talked LOUD.

I left and went to speak to the manager. He told me to go ahead back in and he'd be in a couple minutes so that she wouldn't know it was me.

I went back in and hubby said that she was "shushed" three times by the people 4 rows ahead of them.

Pretty soon Mr. Manager comes in and speaks with her.

He left and things did not improve. He came back a few minutes later and observed her and then asked her to leave. He escorted her and her brood right out of the showing.

Never had that happen before. I felt kinda bad, but the place was oh-so-quiet after she left.

The other day we went grocery shopping. While on the way home three cars in three separate locations did u-turns in the middle of the road-with traffic around. By the time the third car did it the kids were asking if it was all right to do that. I mentioned something about it usually being illegal. Hubby said, "Not in our state" and then we passed a church sign that read:

"God allows U-turns"

We laughed the whole way home.

Causing a Commotion

I almost caused a commotion this morning in church. The moment I sat down after exiting the stage from worship I reached into my purse and grabbed a mint. The mint practically flew out of my hand. I'm not sure how high it went but it twirled through the air and landed on the floor.

Now, this wasn't an ordinary mint. Not a little white Tic-Tac. Not a neutral colored Altoid. No, this was a one inch bright pink Canada mint. Drat that wintergreen goodness!

Once it landed on the floor it rolled to a stop and perched on its side. Thankfully I was seated in my usual spot on the front pew and no one seemed to have noticed. I giggled through the incident and then almost laughed out loud when my pastor hubby announced his sermon title as, "Rocks and Rolls."